I’m sure you’ve all experienced those “wine moments”. You know, those nights where you go out to a cafe with a couple of good friends, order a couple bottles of wine, sit at a table for hours, chatting about life. And then you end up back on your couch with the same people, different wine in your glass, and a louder, more animated tone of voice. Then the feelings start coming. The “heart-to-hearts” as I like to call them. Those moments where, for a little while, you aren’t afraid to share your soul.
Well, I had one of those wine moments last night. I’ve had my fair share of wine moments, and each time, I go to sleep feeling a strange comfort. Like, wow, I’m not the only one who struggles with things.
My friends and I are very different. I’m the mega-romantic, always feeling over-sized feelings, love to pour my soul out to whoever will listen, wearing a dress 9 times out of 10, crazy, curly hair, brutally honest with everybody, friend.
Julia is the introvert, the girl who loves to spend time alone, always wearing a bright lip and neutral tones, highlighting her dark, short hair and razor-sharp bangs. She hates feelings, especially when she has to show or talk about them. She’s the friend who will always sit and listen to you blab on about your problems. She’s the advice-giver, and the observer. Julia is the one who is sure about who she is and what she wants. I admire that about her.
Anna is larger than life. Bright, fun, always wearing pom-pom earrings and a patch-covered bomber jacket, Anna laughs like thunder, dances as if no one is watching, and will always be the first one to join in on a sing-along. Anna is never afraid to tell you how she feels. She’s the picture of joy.
Chloe is the beauty, the girl every guy feels the need to hit on, but knows that she is way out of their league. She’s the friend who will listen, but also shoot back with truth bombs, even if you don’t want to hear them. Chloe is loyal to the people she loves. She will drop everything to help a friend in need. Chloe’s facial expressions make everything a little bit better, her bright smile and big eyes lighting up the room. She’s the perfect stay-in-and-watch-random-youtube-videos-and-laugh-until-you-cry kind of friend. Always fashion-forward and chic, looking as if she’s right out of a magazine, she holds a confidence that I think every girl would love to have.
There are so many differences between us, our strengths and weaknesses, our personalities, our feelings, our goals. But we are more alike than the surface will show, and it seems to me that this always comes out during wine moments, during those moments where we feel inclined to share our reality, the truths making up our life.
We all love, and we all break, we laugh and we sob. We’re hopeful toward the future while feeling lost and confused in the present. We’re all discovering.
Anna is in San Fransisco this summer, designing textiles for Pottery Barn Teen. She stepped way out of her comfort zone and moved to a city across the country, a place she had never been, knowing nobody. If that’s not discovering, I don’t know what is.
Chloe is in Lacoste, France, taking history and fashion classes. She’s discovering, a new country, a new way of living; She’s discovering herself.
I think we all are scared of the unknown, of not knowing what will come next. But in those moments of uncertainty, we find the beauty, the feeling of intense euphoria that we’re discovering ourselves. We’re discovering something so terrifying, but equally wonderful.
We are different, pursuing different dreams, living in different places, but we all share these moments, that remind us of our humanness. The moments that will shape us, shape friendships, shape the life we are living, and the life we are seeking. I think we should treat every moment as if it were a wine moment.
As I went to bed last night after hours of wine moments, I felt content with where I am, as a lost and confused and hopeful twenty-something, because you know what, I’m not alone. And I shouldn’t feel ashamed of not having everything together, because nobody does. I find comfort in that, and I think you should too. So go ahead, be a hot mess with me. Take chances and fall down. But get back up, and while you’re at it, discover.